[Sport] Retrospective

Stuff has done their 20 best sporting moments of the year. As they are sporting “moments”, rather than overall performances, the All Blacks appear four times, as do the Black Caps and the Kiwis are there twice. Just to spoil their fun I’ll tell you that their number one is Michael Campbell’s victory at the US Open.

I thought that as a sport’s blogger I should do something along these lines and so I bring you the Inaugural Hammer Awards! (also called “the Hammies” or “the Hamburgs”)

I will give a list of categories with nominees and you can vote for the player/team/whatever you think should win by emailing me. If nobody emails I will just pick the winners. I can also give out special awards, so if you think something is missing send that along too.

Best Team (international representation)

• All Blacks (Lions Tour, Tri-Nations, Grand Slam)
• Kiwis (Rugby League Tri-Nations, first victory in Sydney in 46 years)
• Silver Ferns (Constant domination of Australia who are the only other good team)
• The Knights
• Georgina and Caroline Evers-Swindell (Winning their third straight world double-sculls title)*
• Rugby Sevens team (sixth straight world title)

Note: I also wanted to include the New Zealand A1 GP team but decided not to at the last minute because they haven't finished the season (as far as I am aware) maybe next year.

Best Team (national representation)

• Canterbury Crusaders** (Super 12 victory number five)
• Waikato Magic (Winning the National Bank cup by defeating the Southern Sting 65-39 in Invercargill because they had the home final stolen from them)
• Auckland Blues (NPC victors)
• Bay of Plenty (Scored the most points (20) against the British and Irish Lions)

Best Team (non-New Zealand)

• Chicago White Sox (World Series winners)
• Liverpool (Champions League winners)
• England cricket team (Won the ashes)
• New England Patriots (Won three of last four Superbowls)
• Belmain West Tigers (Won the NRL grand final)

Most Entertaining Series/Tournament

• Chappell-Hadlee Trophy Series (Cricket)
• Fisher & Paykel Cup (Netball)
• British and Irish Lions Tour (Rugby)
• The last Super 12 ever (Rugby)
• Wellington Sevens (Rugby)

Sport of the Year

• Rugby
• Netball
• Rowing
• Rugby League
• Cricket

Sport-you-could-seriously-not-give-a-sh*t-about of the Year

• Yachting
• Kick Boxing (K1 especially)
• New Zealand Basketball
• New Zealand Soccer
• Super 12 Rugby

Best Female Athlete

• Valerie Vili (Bronze at World Athletics Championships and Oceania record)
• Nicky Coles and Juliette Haigh (Winning the world coxless pairs title)***
• Kate McIlroy (winning the women’s race at the World Mountain-Running Championships in Wellington)
• Marina Erakovic (See here for all her tennis achievements)

Best Male Athlete

• Michael Campbell (Won US Open, European golfer of the year)
• Stacey Jones (came out of retirement twice to help Kiwis to victory in Tri-Nations)
• Nathan Twaddle and George Bridgewater (Winning the world coxless pairs title)***
• Mahe Drysdale (World single sculls champion)

Best Performance inside Aotearoa

• Black Caps successful record run chase of 332 over Australia
• All Blacks whitewash of the British and Irish Lions
• Silver Ferns whitewash of Australia
• Black Ferns whitewash of England

Best Opponent

• Australian cricket team
• Springboks
• English rugby team
• British and Irish Lions
• Alinghi

Photo of the Year

1. "Lay up". Duke vs Notre Dame I think (some one help)

2. "Kiss". Fiorentina's Luca Toni (L) heads the ball challenged by AS Roma’s Samuel Kuffour during the Serie A soccer match in Rome's Olympic Stadium

3. "Covered". The New York Liberty's Becky Hammon, in front, guards the Connecticut Sun's 7-foot-two-inch center Margo Dydek, of Poland, during the second half of their WNBA game at Madison Square Garden in New York.

4. "Header" Racing Lens' Eric Carriere grimaces as he heads the ball during the UEFA Cup first round first leg soccer match against Groclin Grodzisk

5. "Ohhhh". Houston Astro recieves back treatment during MLB play-offs

Best Haka

• Kapa O Pango (against South Africa)
• Ka Mate Ka Mate
• Cibi (Fiji’s Haka)
• Manu Siva Tau (Samoa’s Haka)
• New Zealand Maori Haka (couldn’t find the name)

Retiree of the Year

• Matt Te Pou (Most successful New Zealand international rugby coach)
• David Dixon (Guard for the Minnesota Vikings, record number of games started, at one time was the highest paid New Zealand athlete)
• Tana Umaga

By Grabthar’s Hammer They Were Avenged (international version)

• Black Caps successful record run chase of 332 over Australia
• All Blacks beat England with three men sin-binned for questionable offences
• New Zealand Maori finally beat the British and Irish Lions
• Chicago White Sox win World Series
• England win the Ashes

* This particular award is causing some controversy at the Halbergs as Rowing NZ wants all their crews to be considered one team. I chose the Evers-Swindell twins because I consider them to be a team more than the other crews.

** Yes, I know the Super 12 teams gave up their provincial affiliations but I never liked it. Who are they trying to fool?

*** Yes, I realise they are technically a team but I felt bad about leaving them out of the team category.

[Sport] Quick trivia

Just a quick piece of NFL trivia before we get to the main post. So far this week, after 15 games, three QBs have thrown for more than 300yds: Peyton Manning (336), Brooks Bollinger (327) and Steve McNair (310). All of these QBs’ teams lost (but only by a combined 78-61).

[General] Join Us

Christmas has come early for me. Actually it does every year because Amy and I swap gifts early. So what did we get each other?

iPods (is that the right capitalisation for the start of sentence?)

With no consultation we both decided that the other would like a portable music device. So Amy got a Nano and I got a Video.

We are now part of society. We are one of those zombies with white headphones (though I still prefer my big Sony ones). And I have to say I’m enjoying it. Having all of my music in one place is great! I completely agree with hotrod artist Coop (can’t find the exact link but he loves them, trust me).

This also means that we are now criminals, like every one in New Zealand with an iPod. Six (6) of the songs on my new iPod were legally purchased through online music retailer Amplifier. With a couple of exceptions, all of the other songs are from CDs that I own (ie bought). This conversion method is still, as far as I am aware, illegal in New Zealand. So basically everyone with an iPod has broken the law (unless they buy exclusively from Amplifier) because the only legal music download sites (Digirama and Coke) use files that can’t be played on iPods.

I’m not going to offer an opinion on this other than to say what my philosophy is. I believe that I can copy my own CDs as long as it s for my own personal use (such as on my iPod or in my car); now that I have a paying job, if I want music I will pay for it (either on the internet or on CD); if I can’t find the music I want easily or if I need to decide whether I like a new artist I will bit-torrent it; I NEVER steal New Zealand music.

The only people who should locked up for their music purchases or downloads are the ones who are keeping the stupid fu*king frog on the charts.

Some good news for New Zealand music, local boys Fat Freddy’s Drop, have just won an award for worldwide album of the year at the BBC Worldwide Music Awards.

Finally if I haven’t pimped it before GVOD is awesome. Truly awesome. (also available on the sidebar). Check out the Parkour videos and this guy (yes I DID laugh at the fart jokes!)

[Sport] Just passing the time

“Pastime”.

What a nice word. Baseball is America’s National Pastime. Not it’s National Sport. It is the way the Nations passes its time.

Here in New Zealand rugby is our National Sport, but not our pastime. I have a feeling that our pastime is cricket. Beach cricket if I have to be specific, but cricket will do. This is probably because cricket takes SO BLOODY LONG. You can play for four days and end in a draw (possibly because all the players have fallen asleep).

Once again I will get angry emails from the usual suspects. But really this isn’t a rant, it’s a chance to pimp out my friend Mike who has some loverly (sic) photos of the cricket up on his site.

Also to Mr Tibby who said to me: “You don’t enough blog about netball!”

Here is a photo for you.

[General] Hot in the Ciii-tay

You know what it’s a really nice day today. It’s warm and muggy (20º and 80% humidity). It makes walking feel like wading through warm water, not quite as bad as Singapore, but still gooood.

For this reason I am not writing my long-awaited (by me) post on the new weather patterns we are seeing and the possible ill effects, even for the rich folks.

Instead I thought I’d tell you about my day yesterday. I attended a conference that was being put on by a large analytical software company. As part of the conference (and a big incentive to buy their product) the company gave each attendee a ticket to see the premiere of King Kong at Reading Cinemas.

This was, of course, far from the “star”-studded event down the road. Though I’m not sure what makes Don Brash a star? Wasn’t this the man whose election promise was to slash creative funding? The event was perhaps better described as a “star-dusted affair” with the films main actors (sans Jack Black) walking the red carpet, then sneaking out, then sneaking back in for the end. Yes that’s right, we saw you!

I’m not going to give anything away but the film is bloody good! I haven’t sent the original (nor the 70’s version) so I can’t compare stories or atmosphere but the new one is very well done.

The film revels in scenes that have no music. My friends and I have often discussed the way a good scene can be completely ruined by the perceived need for “atmospheric music”. Kong has some very long scenes that have no music at all, and I loved it. Though it may have to do with the following piece of trivia:

Howard Shore had written and recorded much of the score for this film, but shortly before release, he departed from the project. Peter Jackson stated that because of "differing creative aspirations" between the two of them, they both thought it best for Shore to be replaced by James Newton Howard, who was given less than two months to write and record new score for the entire film.

Kong is actually a character and is more the hero than any of his non-digital counterparts, he is also more fleshed out (un-intended pun). Black’s character, Carl Denham, is the exception. Denham can be seen moving through various phases as the circumstances change. Nicely done, but I doubt he (or Adrien Brody) will get the Best Supporting Actor Oscars the studio believes they will.

The effects were convincing. Well I was convinced. Though there was one thing that did piss me off a bit: no one in the film seems to have a fear of heights. Watch it and you’ll see what I mean.

It takes a gigantic Kong-sized dump on the last movie I saw: War of the Worlds (Spielberg Edition). That film was so full of holes and crap acting that it took the idea of “suspended belief” and tied a big fucking anchor to it so that belief stayed well and truly grounded. The small “mob scene” is great and scary but did not save that film. The use of what looked like stock footage and handheld cameras were good and innovative but didn’t happen enough and so didn’t save the film.

Speaking of that. Man was WOTW full of plot and goofs holes! I now have to see the Pendragon Films version which was released at the same time, but stayed as close to the book as possible (to the point where they were wondering if not using an actual culvert would piss fans off). Then again, maybe not. That’ll teach me to stop reading books.

Oh and for those who are interested (which is no one). I am still wading through Hunter S Thompson’s Fear and Loathing in America: Collected letters from 1968-1976. I’m up to Jan 29, 1970.

And for those visitors from the KF Monkey who are thinking “all this guy does is write about sport”. Hell Hamsters in now in post-production (though there will be a Christmas break) and the official site is up. It is gonna be a great “date flick” with more internal consistency than War of the Worlds.

All photos for today’s blog were kindly supplied by Jenny.

[Caution] contains strong language]

Note: this is a rewritten version from yesterday.

In recent weeks I have stopped watching, reading and listening to the news. The only things I have seen are those quick headlines TV3 have during the ads after 6pm and the sports news.

The reason for my news-hermitage is that the news is very, very depressing. It used to be I got angry and yelled at the TV. Seriously, Amy was always saying “you know they can’t hear you”. No ones got angrier at the TV than I did. (Well maybe Rogers.)

So I gave up.

Aside:

[By the way did anyone else see that Ocker Mother Fucker on Close Up @ 7 last night? Commenting on the anti-Lebanese Cronulla riots he said “It’s mob rule…it’s like something you’d see overseas, in the middle east”. There’s a word for people like that and it starts with “Cunt” and ends with “Cunt”.]

I even watch Family Guy (and Clone High when they removed Family Guy) instead of Campbell: Live; though, in all seriousness, I would watch Family Guy over most shows. Campbell is still following up on the whole “oil is running out what are we doing” thing and for that, thanks. He is doing what I suggested.

So yesterday I thought I’d look through the paper. I felt physically ill.

Australian Riots. “Cunts” is not a strong enough word. I cannot think of a strong enough word right now, maybe just a primal scream. Oh and don’t think for a second that [some] kiwis think any different from [their] Aussie brothers in arms.

AAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And then this (from the Monkey):

Let's summarize: Cops mistakenly break down the door of a sleeping man, late at night, as part of drug raid. Turns out, the man wasn't named in the warrant, and wasn't a suspect. The man, frigthened for himself and his 18-month old daughter, fires at an intruder who jumps into his bedroom after the door's been kicked in. Turns out that the man, who is black, has killed the white son of the town's police chief. He's later convicted and sentenced to death by a white jury. The man has no criminal record, and police rather tellingly changed their story about drugs (rather, traces of drugs) in his possession at the time of the raid.

<>
For fuck’s sake!

I give up. This is why I have handing the news-related-blogging reins to my team mates, like Scott (who doesn’t swear as much as me).

[Sport] Basin, Reserved

Wellington’s iconic Basin Reserve is to get a new name. The Basin’s new name will be: the Prime Finance Basin Reserve. So actually the Basin will still be the Basin, because nobody except commentators will call it by its full name.

A lot can be said about sports names, especially stadium names. Candlestick Park in San Francisco is now Monster Field for example. Also the long-term deals made for naming rights can mean that stadiums are named after companies that no longer exist.

Prime finance paid “seven figures” for a three year deal. That money will be used to upgrade the stands and other aspects. It would be nice if some of that money could be put into making all the roads go under the reserve. (This is pipe-dream territory)

Without wishing to go too far into Tom’s territory, traffic on game days at the Basin gets all snarled up, mainly because the Basin has no parking. The Basin is not alone in this respect. I can only think of one New Zealand stadium that has adequate parking facilities: the Caketin (Westpac Trust Stadium) but that works more because it is also above the train station and has a dedicated bus service on event days. Southerners may want to correct me on parking facilities in Dunedin and Christchurch. Check out the parking at the Washington Redskins’ FedEx Field (photo below, click photo for Google map where you can zoom in).

It is the largest stadium in the NFL has ample parking and is on major public transport routes (it even has a helipad if you look closely). Or look at the aforementioned Monster Field on a full day. It’d be hell to drive home (barring trains and buses) but at least you can put your car someplace.

I went to the British and Irish (can’t forget the Irish) Lions game against the Bay of Plenty Steamers at Rotorua’s “International” Stadium. Obviously international standards were a little more relaxed when this stadium was built. There was parking for team buses and that was about it. Shuttle buses were picking up passengers directly in front of the gates which meant once out of the stadium you had a crush of people waiting for the bus that was difficult (at best) to get through.

The New York Jets’ recent failed stadium bid for downtown Manhattan (right) had this covered. They planed for a large multi-storey subway platform and transport directly beneath the stadium (apparently it would be pretty hard to make NY traffic any worse anyway). As a side note the plan was for the stadium to be mostly self-sufficient in terms of power as well. It would serve as a convention centre as well, dismissing claims that it would useless outside of sport. A few cafes, shops or restaurants dotted around the base would make it accessible to the public as more than just a sports stadium but as a focal point.

I understand that the Americans have truckloads more money than we do but still, beyond parking and transport issues, in general our stadiums, here in New Zealand, are of a fairly poor standard. Eden Park is crap. Westpac Stadium should’ve had a roof and another tier of seating (but is the best of the bunch).

When we host the (Rugby) World Cup in 2011 we had better have some decent stadiums and at least one with a roof. In 2011 Tauranga will be one of New Zealand’s major centres, larger than Hamilton (and possibly Wellington) on current growth trends. They already have a half-decent stadium in Blue Chip Stadium. That’s half-decent for minor NPC clashes. Currently it doesn’t even have good lights for night games (it does have a good carpark and is on a major public transport route). They need to super-size that stadium and fast!

Crowd control features might be needed too. At today’s cricket match between NZ and Australia (which Australia will win) Westpac Stadium is emptying the first three rows in order to keep irate fans further from players. That means XX unsold tickets. But I imagine that this is less an architecture problem and more of an alcohol one.

That’ll do, I’m off to Hope Bros to watch the cricket and then to catch Deva Mahal. Drop by if you want.

Oh and Jennifer Aniston is letting everyone in the world know that someone has topless photos of her but that she won’t let them see daylight. I mention this here for two reasons.

• One: to say how mean it is for Aniston to do that considering the sizeable amount of men who will be scouring the net for these picks as we speak.
• Two: to entice these men to my blog to inflate my hit count (haha).

[General] Working Blogger's Cocktail and Literary Society

Tom is getting us organised into a proper well-oiled fully partially fit fighting drinking machine. I just wonder if we’ll get a dental plan out of this.

ps. this may be my shortest post ever!

[Sport] Mythology

Here is a brilliant article from ESPN on NFL Myths and Sins. The Sins are what team shouldn’t do in a game if they want to win and the Myths are things that should be true but aren’t.

For example:

Sin # 4 Allowing more sacks than your opponents means a 70% chance of losing the game (I mentioned this a while back about the Houston Texans, nice to see some one back up my speculation).

Myth # 4 having a 300-yard passer usually means you win is a falsehood. In fact if you do you only have a 40% chance of winning. Crazy huh?!

<>
Well worth the read.

[General] Weekends and Hooleys

Ok as you can see from the last post, I still have yet to master html tables but I am working on it.

How was your weekend? Mine was nice enough. We went to Chow twice in the space of twelve hours: first for cocktails on Friday night (Jane says Rosebuds are now her favourite) and then for Yum Cha (or as they call it Yum Chow) lunch. And we did a whole bunch of Christmas shopping.

On Saturday we saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I am personally not interested in reading children’s books BUT I am so into [good] children’s movies, which I am the first to admit that these are.

The film is good and fun. There is less emphasis on the background junk that was established in the first few films (moving paintings, celebrity ghosts, the tensions between muggle-bloods and those of “pure race”). Even Draco Malfoy is just an annoying dick.

However, the film wasn’t as “dark” and “scary” as some had made out. The kids were put in dangerous situations, but they have since the books started. Ron got a bit grumbly but that was about as dark as it got. I much preferred the Prisoner of Azkban. The best bits for me were Ron’s brothers Fred and George who often just show up for laughs.

[This paragraph contains a spoiler for those who haven’t read the book; the rest of the post is SPOILER free] The strangest bit was the ball scene in which two 18yr old boys take two 14year old girls as their dates. I just thought it was odd. When I was at school 18yr olds dating 14yr olds were weirdos.

[Spoilers over]

Perhaps it’s “darker” because they all have longer hair and are all starting to notice the opposite sex.Oh and once again, Alan Rickman is not given enough lines. By Grabthar's Hammer (and the sons of Wothan) he will be avenged.

We saw the film at the Empire which a new cinema in Island Bay. It’s one of these new small cinemas for adults only (no, not like that). Amy was impressed by the size of the screen considering the small size of the building. The crowd were all over thirty (except for us) and it looked like most of them (like us) had chosen 8.30pm on a Saturday for the lack of children in the theatre. There’s nothing worse than seeing a children’s film when the actual target demographic is in the audience. Also the seats are done in pairs like a row of loveseats. This makes them quite comfortable especially when sitting with ones’ partner and uncomfortable when sitting with anyone else.

Sunday we put up our Christmas decorations and went to the Thorndon Fair. The fair was a little windy but we came away with some stuff. But I’ll tell ya, putting up Christmas decorations while listening to a Christmas album will put you in the festive mood faster than anything I’ve ever come across.

So, over at the Monkey, Rogers is grifting the work of others, but for a good cause.

Tom is creating a Blog-Hooley for any Wellington-based bloggers and commentators who want to come along. Post your preferences on Tom’s blog and we’ll see where we end up.

And my new pastime is the Google Video of the Day blog and searching Google Video for random stuff.

[Sport] The Walking Wounded

Gus Ferrotte is knocked out in this weekend's game between Miami and Buffalo.

A lot of teams are suffering from injuries, but this is what happens every season. Normally a team's slump is determined soley by injuries (like the Jets, but I'm not going to whinge here). Last season it was the Panthers who just could not stay healthy, this season it's the Jets. the Rams as well have suffered from hurt QBs.

Injuries can herald the entry to the league of an under-rated second-string player who amazes everyone and becomes a hero (Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger). Or they can show the lack of depth teams have or why those players were at second and third string.

The Jets game a Gillette Stadium against the Patriots looks like a good contest for the Jets if you look at the injury list.

New York Jets at New England Patriots
NYJ	OUT	RB Derrick Blaylock (Ankle) QB Jay Fiedler (Right Right Shoulder)
	QUESTIONABLE	NT Sione Pouha (Calf)
	PROBABLE	RB Curtis Martin (Knee) SS Rashad Washington (Hip)
NE	DOUBTFUL	T Matt Light (Ankle)
	QUESTIONABLE	T Tom Ashworth (Knee) RB Corey Dillon (Calf) FB Heath Evans (Shoulder) RB Kevin Faulk (Foot) WR David Givens (Knee) TE Daniel Graham (Shoulder) WR Bethel Johnson (Pelvis) OLB Willie McGinest (Finger) FB Patrick Pass (Hamstring) SS James Sanders (Ankle) SS Michael Stone (Ankle)
	PROBABLE	QB Tom Brady (Shoulder)

Except that the Jets have a giant-boatload more injuries that aren’t listed here, like QB Chad Pennington, C Kevin Mawae, LB Eric Barton, TE Chris Baker, T Jason Fabini, WR Wayne Chrebet, T Marko Cavka, S Andre Maddox, LB Darrell McClover.

Note: according to the above list (which is taken from NFL.com) Jay Fiedler injured his “Right Right Shoulder”. He’s not as bad as Rams’ QB Marc Bulger who has injured his “Right Right Right Shoulder” Steelers’; QB Charlie Batch is out with a “Right Right Right Hand” injury. Indianapolis kicker Mike Vanderjagt has a sore “Right Right Calf”. But easily the worst injury goes to Arizona kicker Neil Rackers. Rackers is out with an injury to his “Left Left”.

The Patriots list doesn’t include their IR players as well (like Rodney Harrison). However (the game has now started) the Pats are using most of the players listed as questionable.

Moreover the lists don’t (obviously) mention those who are just banged up. Both Jets’ QBs Vinny Testaverde and Brooks Bollinger have had injuries in the past two weeks.

Interestingly the team with the smallest injury list this week is the Chicago Bears, who only have Cedric Benson out with a knee injury.

Below is a list of all the injuries for week 13 (this does not include those on the Inujured Reserve list).

Injury Type	Number of Injuries of this type in Week 13
Knee	50
Ankle	28
Hamstring	23
Shoulder	15
Foot and Toe	15
Calf, Fibula and Lower Leg	11
Thigh and Quadriceps	10
Groin	9
Back	8
Concussion and Head	8
Elbow and Arm	7
Hip and Pelvis	6
Chest and Ribs	6
Hand, Thumb, Wrist and Finger	6
Neck	5
Flu/Illness	4
Tooth	2
Abdomen	2
TOTAL	215

Obviously there is a problem with reporting errors with some team being as specific to say “quadriceps” while others say “thigh”, some say “flu”, and some say “illness”. So I have combined categories where it seems correct to.

Knees are the most injured body part, followed by ankles and hamstrings. The thumb had as many injuries (3) as the finger, the wrist and the hand put together. But it seems that if you want to do the un-sportsmanlike thing of removing an opposition player from the field it would a good idea to aim for the legs. Actually it was this idea that brought about the rule that a player cannot “lead with his head” in a tackle.

The Bengals have two players listed as probable with “tooth” problems. Perhaps the sugary colour of the uniforms has given the players cavities. St Louis has three players listed as questionable and one as probable due to concussion, perhaps they need to stop cheaping-out on the helmets.

Teams are still having to grapple with injuries this week. the Browns lost their highly drafted Braylon Edwards, the Dolphins lost Gus Ferrotte when he was knocked out (photo above) and the Packers' Bubba Franks got hurt in this tackle by Lance Briggs (photo below).

That’ll do for some morning analysis.

Mahalo

ps. This last photo shows how football is truly like a ballet (with 300lb 7 foot tall men).

[General] Bloggers, Transform and Roll out!

A workmate of mine (Rachel this is your first mention on my blog!) just passed this info on to me.

NZ’s first international blog conference - March 17-18, 2006. (I'll put a link in the sidebar as well for the late comers).



I'll be there (or at least that's the plan at the moment) and maybe I'll see you? of course I wont know what you look like... unless I already know you... best leave it there before it gets confusing.

[Sports] These are people in your neeeeighbourhood

Congratulations to Barcelona midfielder Ronaldinho. The Brazilian footballer has just received the prestigious European footballer of the year award at a ceremony in Paris. Ronaldinho pushed aside challenges from goal scoring machine Andrei Shevchenko (Ukraine and AC Milan), the freakish Thierry Henry (Arsenal and France), Chelsea and England hero Frank Lampard, and European Cup winner and Liverpool captain, Steven Gerrard (England). A further accolade sees Ronaldinho as a World Footballer of the Year finalist alongside Lampard and Cameroon striker, and fellow Barcelona player, Samuel Eto. Should he win the World Player title he will complete a remarkable triple crown after also securing the inaugural FIFPro World Player of the Year award in September. The 25 year-old apparently born to play football and “the successor to the great Pele” appears to have the footballing world at his feet. You can check out some of his talent here.

He still looks like a horse though.

[Sport] Be like Mike

I forgot to put up (even though we were talking about it over the weekend) that Mike has done a very good statistical analysis on the All Blacks.

Seems some drunken Scotsman (yes that was a cheap shot) said that the All Blacks could take on and beat all the Grand Slam teams in one day! No doubt, but now here's proof.

Selah

[General] Wax Off

Pat Morita (73): 1932-2005

[Sport] Rugby: By the numbers

Once again I bring you exotic statistics from far off lands (Scotland). Well, that is to say I’m here in New Zealand but the stats come from far off lands. The final test of the All Blacks’ end-of-season northern hemisphere tour finally gave us a second Grand Slam and an 11-1 record for 2005. This Grand Slam was a little bigger than the 1978 tour because this year the All Blacks whitewashed the Lions as well.

[Note: this post was supposed to go up yesterday but I was sick, sorry]

This post will be little different to my last one, because this time I was able to see the game twice and on different channels (Sky and TV3). So not only was I able to take actual game statistics (which may not exactly marry with the official ones because it was just me recording them) but also I can do the FIRST EVER cross-commentary comparison.

Right let’s get into it:

Before we got onto the field we had already beaten the Scots at their own game

• Number of red heads in team: All Blacks 1, Scots 0
• Number of “Macs” in team: All Blacks 3, Scots 0

However the Scots clawed one back

• Number of pipers on field for national anthem: New Zealand 0, Scots 162

The Scots ran us close for most of the game. This can be mainly attributed to our handling errors.

Handling Errors
	First half	Second half	Total
All Blacks	12	9	21
Scots	2	3	5

By “handling errors” I mean knock-ons and forward passes.

So why did we win? Well let’s have a look at some other numbers.

Turnovers
	First half	Second half	Total
All Blacks	1	4	5
Scots	3	3	6

Line-outs won against the throw
	First half	Second half	Total
All Blacks	3	2	5
Scots	0	1	1

Scrums won against the feed
	First half	Second half	Total
All Blacks	1	0	1
Scots	0	0	0

Line-Breaks
	First half	Second half	Total
All Blacks	3	0	3
Scots	2	2	4

I should give some definitions here. By “turnovers” I mean where the ball is taken from the opposition (not through a handling error, kick or penalty) usually at the ruck. By “linebreak” I mean where a player eludes one or more tacklers to make ground; I did not consider a player making ground while in the tackle to be a linebreak.

So we beat them in the lineout. This is actually quite telling considering that the Scots play was mainly kicking to keep the All Blacks in their own territory.

A lot of our runs aren’t counted here either as they were outside runs that never went through tacklers. There were a lot of these that made a lot of ground but were eventually snuffed out by handling errors or tackles.

Was it the penalty count then?

Penalties
		First half	Second half	Total
Ruck/Maul	All Blacks	2	5	7
	Scots	1	2	3
Offside	All Blacks	1	0	1
	Scots	1	0	1
Scrum	All Blacks	1	1	2
	Scots	1	0	1
Line-out	All Blacks	1	0	1
	Scots	0	1	1
Dissent	All Blacks	1	0	1
	Scots	0	0	0
TOTAL	All Blacks	6	7	13
	Scots	3	3	6

So we were penalised a lot more than the Scots, especially in the ruck and maul area. This often happens though when the hemispheres “collide”. When the northerners head south they get pinged for offside more often (that’s an observation not a stat) it’s just the nuances of how we play the game.

Despite the large count against us the Scots only kicked two penalty goals (one of which missed wide right). Instead they opted for the lineout (usually in the left corner, when they could reach it), this may have been another stumbling block for them as we saw above the All Blacks seemed to dominate the lineout.

These numbers still don’t give a clear indication of why we won though. These ones do:

Kicks
	Number of kicks	Kicks recovered	Kicks not recovered	Kicks charged by opposition
All Blacks	8	3	5	1
Scots	17	1	16	0

I haven’t included any penalty or free kicks and I have also excluded any kicks that went out of bounds (intended or not). By recovered I mean that the kicking team gets the ball back without having to make a tackle or the receiving team committing a penalty.

The Scots only recovery came from a knock on by fullback Isaia Toeava and one of the All Blacks recovered kicks was Rico Gear’s first try.

So basically every time the Scots kicked they lost possession, and they kicked a lot. This tactic is the main reason for the territory stat which didn’t favour the Scots but made the game look closer than it was.

Those are the only numbers I have but here are some more stats.

The only All Black to play in every game of the northern hemisphere tour was Leon MacDonald

Of the current All Black wingers only Doug Howlett has scored less tries than tests he has played in (41 tries in 50 tests). Rico Gear and Joe Rokocoko have even records (Gear is 10-10 and Rokocoko is 30-30). Sitiveni Sivivatu is above average with eight tries in six tests. If Sivivatu keeps up this average he will have scored 67 tries by the time he gets to 50 tests. (David Campese currently holds the world record at 64).

Rico Gear scored the most tries on the tour with five and Dan Carter scored 39 total points. Only two forwards scored tries Sione Lauaki and Keven Mealamu.

On Lauaki’s try the ball passes through 11 sets of hands. The last two sets were James Ryan’s and Lauaki’s (note: the BBC calls him "Lauki"). Ryan never actually held the ball but bobbled it four times before flicking it to an unsuspecting Lauaki who bobbled the ball three times before gaining control and scoring. This was similar to Doug Howlett’s try in the NPC final. A player does not need to have control of the ball just as long as he doesn’t knock it forward into the hands of another player (or the ground).

In the first half the Scots lost 10m with the ball in hand and then gained 15m with a short kick (which was recovered by the All Blacks). At another point the Scots lost 5m with the ball in hand before kicking.

First Five Eighths Nick Evans scored 10 consecutive points.

Last week the All Blacks got a metre inside the goalline, passed and didn’t score. This week the Scots rumbled roughly six men across the line with the ball in hand and didn’t score.

The Television Match Official, C. Berdos (France), who officiated against the Scots attempt over the goalline; could be heard saying to referee N. C. Whitehouse (Wales): “I cannot watch the ball!”

Commentators clash:

While Sky TV’s Murray Mexted is a New Zealand icon for his verbose insertions into the commentary he has a new foe in the mentally impaired Hamish McKay of TV3. Mexted has the advantage in these clashes as he is merely the “colour commentator” and has a very capable “play-by-play” who talks nearly all the time giving only brief periods for Mexted and the sideline commentator to speak.

Over at TV3 McKay has decided that he is both colour and play-by-play and the commentary is filled with large gaps where no one is speaking at all. His assistant is Frank Bunce who is also not immune to the odd lapse in mental capacity.

As such the only thing that Mexted did all game (that was even slightly noteworthy) was to say: “Someone told me earlier [to] beware of the Mighty Jocks!”

McKay, however, was on fire.

• Number of times McKay said “Free on three”: 2
• Number of ad breaks during “free” rugby: 5
• Number of puns made by Hamish McKay: 1 (but it was terrible, see below)
• Number of times McKay got excited enough to use his “growly voice”: 30
• Number of commentary faux pas made by McKay: 4 (+1 made by Frank Bunce)

McKay was heard to say before the game even started that the Scots would give the All Blacks a “big crack”.

He then, while describing the field, he used the phrase: “it’s rock hard (growly voice) if not a little slippery”. During the game he tried to get Bunce to confirm that hard and slippery were indeed the conditions.

McKay said once and then continued to say that the All Black scrum was “power assunding” the Scottish. He used this phrase on at least two occasions and the words “power” and “asunder” in many similar sentences.

Finally, in what could be another “Man love moment”, as Richie McCaw limped from the field McKay said: “[McCaw’s] got something going on in the leg department”.

The single pun, while not as bad as Sivivatu “kavaing up” the Irish, was about newcomer Isaia Toeava. They said Isaia was the new “Ice Age”. By the way, Isaia was the first teenager to debut for the All Blacks since Jonah Lomu back in 1994.

Frank Bunce was not going to be left behind. He watched as Scottish winger Shaun Lamont ran from his own goalline to be tackled by Tana Umaga on the All Black 22m line: a run of 78m, easily figured out. Bunce said: “What was that? 60m?”

So the tour is over. We outscored our opponents 138-39 over four games. Interestingly the Lions (which is the best of England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales) scored 40 points against us over three games. And that’s it for rugby until the Super 14.

American Football stats tomorrow if I get a chance to get to it

Mahalo

UPDATE: I have grappled with the html tables and have finally got them under some kind of control. thanks for your patience.

tags: Rugby New Zealand Statistics All Blacks