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Wednesday, June 15, 2005

[General] It's the end of the World as we know it

…and I feel fine.

Really fine, because I know for a fact that we (as human beings) have maybe 100 years tops before the Earth is so screwed it can longer support us. And I’ll be dead by then. And if I’m not, then I will be (if you catch my logic). So this means I can plan ahead without worrying about the environment et al.

This post is about the end of the world. If you would rather find out for yourself how this is all going to end then I should point out that the following post contains [[SPOILERS]].

(That’s a joke by the way).

Remember the World Bank’s small report detailing how on our current path the Earth will be sucked of resources (and it will be too late to turn things around) in about 50-100 years. 50 years is a little close for comfort but still gives me a lot of time.

Noticed how it was big news for one day and then it disappeared. Hands up who thought that was because the problem went away? My opinion was that this should have been a special news coverage event like September 11, 2001. That day 2,986 people died. This report by the World Bank killed 6,446,131,400. Actually the death toll will be much higher as that number is just the CIA’s July 2005 estimate.

If some Hippy in a dirty pair of jeans and sandals came up to me and said “stop using oil” I would tell him, politely to go away (it never hurts to be polite). Now, if the World Bank says that we should curb our use of things like oil I sit up and listen. One dude (and I use the term loosely) I told this to said, “Oh, the World Bank said that, well I wouldn’t believe them”.

Perhaps the World Bank knows this and is using reverse psychology on us. Who knows? All I know is: if someone tells you that you are on fire, it is better to check and tempt ridicule than burning to death.

So we’re off to Hell. How are we going to get there? In a handbasket you say, excellent! Wait a second, maybe I should try to stop this, what can I do? I’ll tell you:

Sweet Jack All!

You see there are too many people who are heading in the wrong direction for us to turn around. Actually that’s incorrect. There are only a few, but they are the ones with all of the power. For example, if you would like a little cry, try this from Public Address:

Meanwhile, at the same time that the national academies of science for all the G8 countries, along with those of Brazil, India and China, issue an unprecedented joint statement urging governments to take urgent action on climate change - with a particular focus on the Bush White House - it is being reported that a former oil industry lobbyist in the White House has been repeatedly altering or removing information about climate change from official reports. A senior Environmental Protection Agency scientist told the New York Times these actions have produced "somewhat of a chilling effect." The Times has obtained copies of the documents bearing the actual alterations.

See what I mean. When the guy (or girl) in control of most of the pollution got rich on, and into power with, money from pollution-based industries it is quite unlikely that they are going to turn around and say “right, let’s stop all of this”.

But wait, if enough of us gather together all over the world we can… Let me stop you there. Remember the protests about the (then about-to-happen) Iraq war? Have a look at the numbers while you’re there. ~10,000,000 people said that they didn’t want something and it still happened. They represent only 0.15 percent of the world’s population. However, leaders see this as 99.85 percent support of their plans and go ahead. 51 percent of the world’s population (3,287,527,014 people) is never going to protest about anything. You go to everyone and explain to them that they will die a long slow death over the next 50 years unless enough people protest and they still won’t protest. Maybe I’m being pessimistic.

We could vote them out? Nah, you see there are f*cktards, like the guy I mentioned before (“the World Bank are liers”), who vote for the same party over and over again. Voters in some countries (::coughamericacough::) shouldn’t even bother voting any more.

Here is what we need, (at least what I think we need, I welcome other suggestions and ideas). You ready?

A dirty big countdown clock.

Something on at least one major news network showing just how much we all have left. Like the Doomsday Clock only digital. It could be superimposed over all the bulletins so if you start to watch something about, say, political infighting, you can see the clock and say, “Wait a second that is my life ticking away and those f*ckers are arguing about who should get the foreshore!” (By the way the answer is, given the topic of this post: Whoever won’t f*ck it up). While you watch these muntards releasing doves and crying you can say, “Wow, I thought this mattered but it doesn’t”.

And that’s the thing that people have to overcome. The world will basically end sometime in the next 50-100 years (crazy Old Mother Earth still keeping us guessing), so whatever you think is currently the most important thing in the world is actually not.

Here is a list (I’m trying to keep things local):

  • Education
  • Boy Racers
  • Immigration (Th’y t’’k ‘’r j’b – that’s a South Park joke)
  • Seabed and Foreshore
  • Policing
  • Flu vaccinations
  • Religion
  • Homosexuals (and/or civil unions)
  • Unemployment

All of these things are not that important anymore and should only rank as high as second on your list of priorities. Number one should be:

“Remember that the world will end in the lifetime of my children or grandchildren.”

As far as I know this is the first time in history that human could say that with any certainty.

So, if any of you have a website I suggest that you put a “countdown clock” on it like this one (or these). If you run a television show, put a countdown on it (even if it’s a sitcom). Set it to hit zero at about March 2056 (or a bit later if you are more relaxed). We need people to be constantly reminded that this is all the time they have left. And, because we can’t do anything about it (thanks World Leaders and Muntards, you do us proud), we need to fill in these last 50-or-so years completely.

As the Kung Fu Monkey says (and who is going to argue with a Kung Fu Monkey?):

"Everybody who wants to live in the 21st Century, over here. Everybody who misses the 1800's over there. Good, thanks. Good luck with that."

ps. I was talking about this tonight to my partner and she mentioned that if it's all over in 50 years time then that means we really only have 20 or so years before life starts getting shitty. Have a good day :)


ben.run said...

A lot of people find it comforting to say something like "I don't belive in global warming, its just something some scientists made up"
I know someone at work who has this attitude. I've pointed out to him that these "silly scientists" have spent years of their life studying this as opposed to his complete lack of knowledge, so maybe their opinion is more valuable? Doesn't seem to pursade him.


P.S. You countdown thing needs formating!

Anonymous said...

Global warming sounds like a good idea. I don't like winter all that much as it is, why not just get rid of it. Come to think of it, we should all be aspiring to live in a world with weather that you usually only see with the months without the letter R in them. Bring on the beach umbrellas and sunscreen!

Anonymous said...

Could you actually post a link to the World Bank report concerned? Good to know that my fears that we are all fucked are no irrational though.