New Depths for Bad Remakes

I thought I’d have a listen to the “new” Thriller. Big mistake.

25 years ago, Michael Jackson and Quincy Jones put together the greatest album ever. Ever. This year, as a tribute to this great accomplishment, Thriller has been re-released. And what do you do when your re-release something? That’s right you add remixes.

Perhaps it was his recent legal troubles, perhaps it was his creepy weirdness, but Jackson’s collaborations (and it does sound like he may have been in the studio for some of these) seem poorly chosen. Anyway here’s what you get:

First up you get some unreleased Vincent Price audio which is awesome, though mainly because it’s Vincent Price asking if you can “dig it?”.

The next four songs are a slog as Jackson collaborates with the worst bits of Black Eye Peas (remember when they were good?) Will.I.Am and Fergie. That tells you how good the tracks are. Will.I.Am turns The Girl is Mine into a one-sided affair where Michael Jackson sings and then Will just says how she loves how he “rocks”.

Akon shows up for Wanna be Startin’ Somethin’ and turns it into a cover which is ok, except that it’s a bad cover.

I had high hopes for the Kanye West Billie Jean remix but…it just falls short of what it shouldv’e been. And Kanye can’t help but add in his own vocals but instead of owning a verse or two he just throws in a few off hand “uh”s, “yeah”s and “number one”s.

Then the last track is For All Time. A track that wasn’t good enough for the album 25 years ago, so why add it now?

Sigh.

In the meantime I’ve also been listening to Lupe Fiasco’s The Cool. It’s much better. As is Daft Punk’s Alive 2007.

Also check out Daft Punk and Kanye West performing at the Grammys. Too fucking cool, check out the “Tron” suits.