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Wednesday, February 09, 2005

We don't like Cricket, Oh no!

I had my first "angry" response to a blog. How controversial! Here is some of the text.

You've dissed our reputation as a sporting nation, our media, and cricket. Fair enough, media internationally suck.

But don't go dissing cricket.
Cricket is the only reason you have an ass to sit on. No cricket, and the worlds most agressive nuclear nations would already have started playing nuclear tiggy. Every time they play cricket, the heart rate of everyone should drop. Indian and Pakistan fans sit next to each other and wave their banners in happy harmony.

Not if the Indian bloke at work is anything to go by. Nor the scenes of various stuff burning in the stands at cricket matches…wait that might have been Christchurch.

Noone plays American football.

Actually there is an NFL Europe league that is kinda interesting and the genesis of many great players of the current era. NZ, as I have linked to before, has a American football league, and I understand that the sport has a HUGE following in South Auckland.

A lot of people play soccer, but notice how they are mostly Catholic. Rugby Union & League are for the rich and poor Anglicans respectively. Only Cricket is played by such a range of different religions, from the Muslims in Pakistan (and welcome to international cricket, the all conquering Bangladesh), to the range of religions in India, the pious poms, and the ex-fascist South Africa.

…If not for cricket, we wouldn't have feet to march with. Worship cricket. For it is a merciful and forgiving god.

This is a good point and I suppose I should point out that I have nothing against cricket. The idea of sitting with a picnic, a glass of wine or beer in your hand at some small venue (even the Basin Reserve), the sun on your back, listening to bees buzz and the clack of leather on willow sounds very nice. Similarly, getting plastered with your friends over the course of a day for some one run victory over the Aussies and then burning the couch you dragged in from your mate’s flat also has its appeal.

It’s just hard to imagine a game of cricket being thrilling, all the time. Most of the plays in cricket are dull. Block, block, single, block, single, block. Or worse, a maiden over with no wickets. They often bring in spinners to slow things down!

My friend (who just pointed out that a golf game was described by the Dom Post as “drama filled” and “intoxicating”) believes a sport is exciting if there is a chance you’ll miss something if you look away. But with cricket you know when not to look away, i.e. when the bowler bowls. With football, soccer and rugby et al. you never know when it will be safe to avert your gaze. Even in football where there are gaps between the plays, a quick offence can fool both the viewer and (on occasion) the broadcaster.

But hey you wanna watch cricket, that’s cool. I hold no grudge against you. As long as you don’t support the Aussies.

I would like to note that NO ONE came to the defence of poor Eric Young. Sorry Eric, seems you can rot in hell.

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